The Harmony of a Creative Symbiosis; The Story of a Bee and a Flower.

"Bread feeds the body, but flowers feed the soul. Earthly flowers are a living bond between Earth and Heaven.  Their pollen is like magic gold dust and bees carry it into nature to spread life. Through the harmonic symbiosis of  bees and flowers heaven settles down upon earth."  Cassandra Eason

Bees love flowers,  inside this incredible environment, they search for nectar. The force of nature that brings a bee and a flower together is something remarkable. Then comes the creation of honey, just image...  A bee leaves the coolness of the beehive, goes out in the light of day, and flies around until it  gets to a beautiful flower, lands on the flower and goes inside. ... And  there, inside the flower, immersed in a  bouquet of smells and tastes it finds a little puddle of pure nectar, and with it creates a gift for human pleasure, sweet honey.

In,  A Policy of Kindness, The Dalai Lama wrote: “I am attracted to bees because I like honey, it's really delicious.  Their sweet  product is something we cannot produce, or imitate, very beautiful, isn’t it?  Even these insects have certain responsibilities, they work together very nicely.  They have no constitution, they have no law, no police, nothing, but they work together effectively.  We human beings, we have constitutions, we have law, we have a military force, we have religion, we have norms.  But in actual practice, in our society, I think we are behind bees.”

In the "dominant" cycle of the food chain, the strongest kill the weakest and the cycle of life goes on, sometimes this is called the “Grand Design”.  There's nothing wrong with it,  it's just the way it is. Yet, bees follow another plan, they occupy a statistically unique place in the natural world, opposite of  the “Grand Design”.  Bees live  in a full blown embrace with nature. Their relationship with their world is one of benefit, support, and enhancement.  The bee's relationship with the plant  it visits is mutually beneficial.  The consequence of this relationship is that  more flowers are made by cross pollination which, in turn, makes more food for humans produced from those plants.

From early times the bee has been used to represent the image of the Goddess.  Aphrodite,  Goddess of love, was worshipped at a honeycomb-shaped shrine at Mount Eryx. Her High Priestess was called Melissa, meaning bee. The hexagonal shape of the honeycomb (six was the number of Aphrodite and later Venus) was believed to be the sacred geometric shape of harmony. Indeed the mathematician Pythagoras believed that the honeycomb form suggested a symmetry that was reflected in the cosmos itself.
In Greek mythology Melissa is also the name  of the nymph that helped save Zeus from his father, Cronus. She hid him in the hills and fed him honey. When Cronus discovered this, he tried to destroy her  but Zeus, in gratitude, changed her into a Queen bee.  In the ancient world  bees were often seen  as divine messengers and honey was described as  ambrosia or the food  of the Gods. Later on bees also became symbols of the Virgin Mary, she is  the  protectress of beekeepers and consecrated honey is offered on altars  August 15, the date linked with her ascension into heaven.

In the writings, artwork and symbolism of cultures and religions around the world from time immemorial there are references to the bees and the substances they collect in Nature and make in their bodies, namely honey, bee pollen, royal jelly and wax.  These substances, along with the bees and the beehive, have been held in high esteem throughout human history in every part of the world. The bee is symbolic of  community, prosperity, fertility, cooperation,  sweetness, symmetry, and balance. They have  also been considered a flying miracle.  Aerodynamically, a bee's  body is too large for its wings and it should not be able to fly, although now we understand how it does fly (high rate of wing movement). For this reason the bee is  a symbol of accomplishing anything we put our mind to,  and the references are  almost always of renewal, rebirth and new beginnings.  

A Serendipitous Encounter With My Inspiration

My dog Lila is the most fun loving birthday gift I've ever gotten and I credit her with making me discover the amazing beauty of Central Park. Before I got her, I had never been "forced" to go on early morning walks every day, so I didn't really pay much attention to the daily changes in the park. The first snow falls and ice covered trees in the Winter; the budding purple crocuses that signal the Spring; the deep green grass of the Summer; and the rainbow of colored leafs in the Fall. 

We always enter the park on 68Th Street and 5Th Avenue and walk down a small path lined with green benches. About three years ago I noticed a bench with a silver sign  that said "Reserved For Lovers Only. 40 Joyous Years. Evelyn and Leonard Lauder".

I realized I knew who they were and remembered reading about them. They are the couple that owns the Estee Lauder cosmetics company, and Leonard is the son of the famous Estee Lauder. The sign was very inspirational so I sat down on the bench and thought that one day I should interview older couples in the park, and ask them about the secrets behind their love stories. How about the secrets for something like "40 Joyous Years" ?    I thought that was definitely the kind of subject that was worthy of some real research. At some point, but I don't remember when, I saw another bench, not far from the first one, and it said: "To my beloved Evelyn. Our 50Th anniversary is just the beginning. Love as always. Leonard". After reading the sign I thought Leonard was clearly a very smart man, that had to be one of the secrets for sure. 

I finally started writing this blog last weekend after meeting an amazing couple, Rita and Douglas. But life has serendipitous events that happen when you least expect them, and this morning I was to meet the source of my inspiration, face to face. As I was exiting the park on the path that leads back to 5Th Avenue, I saw an older and very elegant man sitting on a bench and busily talking on his cellphone. I immediately recognized him, I had seen his picture before, it was Leonard Lauder. I really wanted to say hi to him, but was so nervous. I mean, he is only one of the richest people in New York; and I felt he would probably not be too happy to have to greet an intrusive stranger that approached him in the park. But I felt I had to talk to him, so I waited until he finished his call, I summoned my courage to approach him and said:  "Hi Mr. Lauder, I wanted to tell you that I love your benches and I think they are the most romantic places to relax in the park" He gave me a big smile, then shook my hand warmly and said "Thank you dear, that's very kind of you, I will tell my wife". 

I was so happy to meet him, and was relieved because he didn't seem  bothered at all, but instead was so nice to me. I guess he doesn't get approached that often by petite girls with small dogs that congratulate him for being romantic with his wife; and for his messages on park benches. Probably other more business oriented references come first when someone says "Hi" to Mr. Lauder. 

Many articles have been written about him, his wife and their financial empire, so I will not attempt to give you my limited version here. What I can say is that it is clear that they have always known what is truly important in life. Leonard Lauder is also a very lucky man because his wife is a very smart and caring woman. Evelyn Lauder was born in Vienna in 1937,  as a child she was forced to flee the persecution of Nazi-ruled Austria and ended up in New York. She later became a public school teacher in Harlem, and in 1955 she met Leonard on a blind date that was set up by one of her high school friends. From the start Evelyn created a very good relationship with Estee Lauder, who would soon become her mother in law, and later would make her one of the creative forces and the Senior Vice President of their family run business, Estee Lauder Companies. Evelyn is admirable because she  has used her power and recognition to raise awareness for one of the most important issues for women's health. She established the Breast Cancer Research Foundation in 1992, and she is the creator of  the pink ribbon campaign, that has  so far raised million of dollars for breast cancer. Following her successful idea, many other health related campaigns have chosen a different ribbon color for their causes. For me, Evelyn and Leonard are an inspirational couple because they have taken full advantage of the abundance that life has given them, and they have not lost sight of what is truly important. Love, partnership, creativity, contribution, and the celebration of it all. This is why after I saw their bench for the first time,  I knew they would be the inspiration for a subject worthy of research; "40 Joyous Years" and they are still counting, this year it's 55.  Mazel Tov ! and may they enjoy many more years together!

If you want to read more about them, their story, and what they have contributed to others, follow this link for a Wall Street Journal article. 

http://magazine.wsj.com/hunter/the-partnership/chemical-attraction/

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/evelyn-lauder

http://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/biography/Lauder.html

If you want to contribute to the Breast Cancer Research Foundation

http://www.pinkribbon.com/

http://www.esteelauder.com/pinkribbon/

A Bench in The Park.

I met Rita and Douglas on a beautiful Fall afternoon in Central Park.  I was relaxing on a bench and they were sitting next to me. So I told them of my project to interview older couples in the park. I said I noticed that they were sitting very close together, and there was something about them that told me their story was a beautiful one. Douglas was happy to continue the conversation and said maybe I felt their connection because they were sitting on their very own bench.  Then he showed me the silver sign that read "Rita and Douglas' Bench" and  mentioned that he had given her the bench for her 75Th birthday. I asked Rita to tell me what she remembered of the first time she met her husband of 55 years. Judging by the level of affection they displayed for each other, I was expecting a love at first sight type of answer, but she said "We met in a very small elevator at work, it was 1953, and I don't remember feeling anything at all". Douglas said he thought she was very cute and a few days later invited her out for dinner on a Thursday night. He mentioned that he chose Thursday because he thought his chances of her turning him down were smaller than if he asked for a Friday or a Saturday night date. Rita laughed, and said she did not remember being crazy about him on their first few dates, but that at some point she fell madly in love with him. She could not describe exactly what she loved about him, and they both agreed that their feelings for each other could not be put into words, it just felt natural. But Rita kept saying she thought he was very handsome and that was why she accepted to go out with him. Douglas mentioned that after about a month of fun dates Rita broke into tears and said she had to confess that she was older than him. She was 22 and Douglas was 21. Apparently he did not have a problem going out with an "older" woman so they started dating. Then Douglas was called into the army to take a post overseas. He said that she considered ending the relationship but that thankfully it did not happen. Rita explained that her family was Catholic and his family was Episcopalian. A decision had to be made, and her family did not approve of her marriage plans to a protestant. Finally Rita decided to get married in an Episcopalian church, but her family did not attend the wedding, except for one of her brothers. She said that she followed her intuition and was determined to stand by the person she loved even if her family did not support her. Shortly after the ceremony they moved to Europe so Douglas could take his post in a U.S. army base. Both said that being away from their families was a blessing because they could make their relationship stronger on their own. They moved back to New York City  a few years later and had four children, three daughters and one son. Rita's family came around after a while and they welcomed Douglas. Fast forward 50 something years and they are happily sitting on their own Central Park bench talking to a stranger about their love story. Their advice for young lovers was that a love of 57 years can only be sustained if the couple was very very very much in love at the start. "You need to build up a lot of steam first, because it's a long ride" said Rita, and then she told her husband that she loved him. Douglas put his arms around her and mentioned that tolerance and acceptance was a big part of the recipe too.  They also said that not every day of the last 57 years had been perfect. Rita was clear that "sometimes you have to put up with craziness " but both agreed that all in all they had always had a lot of fun together. Rita and Douglas said they had never really given much thought as to why they loved each other so much, love was just always there, and most of the time, " it all felt right".  But it was easy to see that "it" was all in the details. Rita told me her husband had given her the bench as a present for her 75Th birthday and that for her 80Th birthday he arranged to pick her up in a 1950's  pink Cadillac, and then took her out to dinner. She smiled and specified that it was a convertible and there was Elvis music on the stereo. If that is the kind of fun they are having after over half a century of being together, it's easy to imagine what was there at the beginning.